I'm 9 days away from participating in the paralympic talent search day and I need to turn my head space around.
Calamity has snowballed over the past 2 weeks: I have dropped and smashed my PDA twice in ten days ($120, $150) and last night locked my keys in my apartment ($120). These things don't really impact me in any meaningful way, but I think energetically I may have drawn them to me by my mounting dread and negativity.
Yesterday was the worst day I have experienced in recent memory. I have been training exceptionally hard and had an extremely tough and rewarding hill session on Wednesday morning. It was physically draining and my legs have suffered. I have also been limiting my carb intake. My first practice run of the beep test yesterday afternoon really reflected these two factors and my result was terrible. My legs just wouldn't serve me, though the lungs were OK. My attitude was terrible going into the test and I let myself down from the very beginning. Worse than the result itself was my emotional reaction to it. I was a tearful mess for the hours following. Its a good sign that I'm carb depleted, over-trained, but most of all, I'm completely overwhelmed.
As a child, I was kicked off the school netball team. I was always the last girl picked for any sports team. My self esteem in the sporting arena was abysmal and my performance reflected my sentiments. In 9 days time, when I step onto that field, I don't want those memories to come with me. I don't want those feelings to hinder me. This fear of failure I'm currently battling is at risk of paralyzing me. I want to send it packing. I want to summon the internal power, the strength and will to make all that negativity turn on its heels and flee. I want this entry to be the turning point to setting me on track to positivity.
The people I will meet at next Sunday's talent search will likely have had very similar childhood experiences to me. They have all faced adversity. Their bio-mechanics are all going to be challenging them in different ways, just as mine challenge me. This is my opportunity to compete on a level playing field. It's also my opportunity to shine. What I would love to be able to do is go in there and beam. I have this light inside me. This power to inspire people just through my radiant love of being alive. I want to generate that energy and to produce enough of it to motivate ALL of us next weekend. I want the experience to be a positive one for every athlete on the field, but especially so for every single person I come into contact with. I want us all to be enriched and feel like winners on the day and for the outcome to be secondary to the experience.
Please send me your love, thoughts, well wishes and positive energy to help me make it so. <3
Friday, September 3, 2010
Sunday, August 15, 2010
The Roof Of Australia
Nearly 20:30 on a Sunday eve. I've just arrived back in Sydney and spring is definitely in the air. It is the conclusion of a fantastic weekend, filled with fun and adventure.
At 13:30 on Friday afternoon, El Flangers picked me up from my apartment in Randwick and we set off for my first ever adventure in the snow. We ate dinner at Angie's Italian in Jindabyne, and just after 21:30pm we pulled up at our accommodation, which until that point had been kept secret from me! We stayed at Rodney the Rocket Fox's Rivergum Lodge, in our own private log cabin with a wood fire and everything!
The mission was to unpack and quickly get to bed, as we needed to be up shortly after 6am. On Saturday, we breakfasted at 7am then headed into to town where we met our guide, Nick, at the Wilderness Sports store and collected our snow shoes and other necessities. Finally, we set out for Thredbo village. It was such a sloooooooow journey because every man and his dog wanted to get to the snow! The weather was beautiful and there had been recent good falls. We, however, were not heading to the fields in order to ski or snowboard. We were headed on a trek from Thredbo to the summit of Mount Kosciuszko on a journey entitled "The Roof of Australia".
As we approached the Kosciuszko Express chairlift, I went into sensory overload, surrounded by glistening white for the very first time and about to embark on my first chairlift experience! It was with much awkward nervousness that I sat between my mals counterparts, but once we were headed up the mountain I quickly began to enjoy absorbing all this new input, the sights and sounds of a busy snowfield. By the time we reached the top, the situation had drastically changed and we faced very different conditions on the mountain. Once we had attached our snow shoes, we started making our way into a very strong headwind, but for the first half hour, we still had clear sky.
It was magic. In the sunlight, I marveled at the way the snow glistened like diamonds. I noticed the different textures of snow; soft, hard, icy, bumpy, flat - all of it incredible to me! As we approached Rams Head, the strong headwind became fierce and the weather closed in. The blue sky was ancient history and we experienced frequent white outs. It was very tough going and as the feeling came and went from my fingers they burned and ached. It was also extremely challenging mentally and just 30 minutes away from the summit, conditions became so bad our guide made the executive decision that we should turn back... But we didn't. We agreed to go another 50m and if it didn't improve then we would abort... Improve it did - albeit very slightly! 30 minutes later and I was ELATED to find myself at the summit of our highest mountain for the second time this year - but under strikingly different conditions to my first encounter with this mountain. That magical place where I feel so centered and alive. Where all things are clear to me and I am able to release myself of all fear and anxiety.
After a quick photo stop, we headed towards Rawsons Pass and homeward bound. Less than 2 hours later, we were back at the chair lift and on our way down to Thredbo village. Of course, once we reached the bottom, the weather was just as perfect as when we had embarked on our journey, if a little windier than before. We essentially trekked the red trail on this map:
Overjoyed but thoroughly spent, we stopped in at the Wild Brumby Schnapps Distillery for a tasting on our way back to Jindabyne. We spent the evening chatting with Rodney back at the Rivergum - as it turns out, he's a city2surf legend and we had much running to discuss :)
Today we made our way back to Sydney at a very leisurely pace and along some very scenic roads.. Secure in the knowledge that our gear for Everest has been successfully tested and that we are made of the right stuff to tough it out! Adam was fantastic company and I am so so grateful to him for taking me on this adventure and organizing it all :) I just had to pack and tag along!
At 13:30 on Friday afternoon, El Flangers picked me up from my apartment in Randwick and we set off for my first ever adventure in the snow. We ate dinner at Angie's Italian in Jindabyne, and just after 21:30pm we pulled up at our accommodation, which until that point had been kept secret from me! We stayed at Rodney the Rocket Fox's Rivergum Lodge, in our own private log cabin with a wood fire and everything!
The mission was to unpack and quickly get to bed, as we needed to be up shortly after 6am. On Saturday, we breakfasted at 7am then headed into to town where we met our guide, Nick, at the Wilderness Sports store and collected our snow shoes and other necessities. Finally, we set out for Thredbo village. It was such a sloooooooow journey because every man and his dog wanted to get to the snow! The weather was beautiful and there had been recent good falls. We, however, were not heading to the fields in order to ski or snowboard. We were headed on a trek from Thredbo to the summit of Mount Kosciuszko on a journey entitled "The Roof of Australia".
As we approached the Kosciuszko Express chairlift, I went into sensory overload, surrounded by glistening white for the very first time and about to embark on my first chairlift experience! It was with much awkward nervousness that I sat between my mals counterparts, but once we were headed up the mountain I quickly began to enjoy absorbing all this new input, the sights and sounds of a busy snowfield. By the time we reached the top, the situation had drastically changed and we faced very different conditions on the mountain. Once we had attached our snow shoes, we started making our way into a very strong headwind, but for the first half hour, we still had clear sky.
It was magic. In the sunlight, I marveled at the way the snow glistened like diamonds. I noticed the different textures of snow; soft, hard, icy, bumpy, flat - all of it incredible to me! As we approached Rams Head, the strong headwind became fierce and the weather closed in. The blue sky was ancient history and we experienced frequent white outs. It was very tough going and as the feeling came and went from my fingers they burned and ached. It was also extremely challenging mentally and just 30 minutes away from the summit, conditions became so bad our guide made the executive decision that we should turn back... But we didn't. We agreed to go another 50m and if it didn't improve then we would abort... Improve it did - albeit very slightly! 30 minutes later and I was ELATED to find myself at the summit of our highest mountain for the second time this year - but under strikingly different conditions to my first encounter with this mountain. That magical place where I feel so centered and alive. Where all things are clear to me and I am able to release myself of all fear and anxiety.
After a quick photo stop, we headed towards Rawsons Pass and homeward bound. Less than 2 hours later, we were back at the chair lift and on our way down to Thredbo village. Of course, once we reached the bottom, the weather was just as perfect as when we had embarked on our journey, if a little windier than before. We essentially trekked the red trail on this map:
Overjoyed but thoroughly spent, we stopped in at the Wild Brumby Schnapps Distillery for a tasting on our way back to Jindabyne. We spent the evening chatting with Rodney back at the Rivergum - as it turns out, he's a city2surf legend and we had much running to discuss :)
Today we made our way back to Sydney at a very leisurely pace and along some very scenic roads.. Secure in the knowledge that our gear for Everest has been successfully tested and that we are made of the right stuff to tough it out! Adam was fantastic company and I am so so grateful to him for taking me on this adventure and organizing it all :) I just had to pack and tag along!
Monday, July 19, 2010
Forging my Way!
What a roller-coaster the past 7 days have been! The wonderful human being who has sparked me up to commence this big adventure shall now be known as Geoff, and subsequent to our meeting on Monday, I have a meeting set up with Tony Adams and Melissa Moon on Thursday morning! Very exciting stuff :)
This week I also met with 2 providers of prosthetic limbs and selected who I am going to proceed with, as they have contacts within the AIS and paralympics.
The first meeting I had on Tuesday left me feeling quite despondent, though of course I never allowed that to show through my determination face. The reality, though, is that upper limb amputations make up only a very small percentage - something like 5% - of all amputees and only a very small percentage of those upper limb amputees are above the elbow. Due to us making up a small minority group, there is no money or market to have stimulated the research, development and production of load bearing, motorised elbow joints. Simply learning this fact left me feeling insignificant and very isolated. Although I learnt that I could acquire tools to assist me in riding a bike, holding a dumbell/barbell and even balance me while I run, my hopes of attempting two-handed push ups and handstands were effectively crushed.
That didn't feel very good. What compounded my sadness and frustrations was that I had no access to speak with anyone like me who would really understand what I was feeling. As a one armed girl in a two armed world, the more I spoke to my friends about it, the more frustrated I became by the fact that they couldn't really get it because they didn't know what disability meant. At the same time, my understanding of what being disabled really means and how it can feel grew tremendously. As my limb deficiency is part of who I am and part of my experience, it would serve me well to become more comfortable with handling these emotions instead of rejecting them in defiance. I'm an adult now and the time has really come for me to embrace and accept the whole package. It is, however, quite a difficult and daunting journey to be embarking on alone. The road is very interesting, but I have no shoulder to cry on when I hit speed bumps. Whilst I'm enjoying the freedom and flexibility of single life, it is difficult facing these challenges alone and a bit sad not to have anyone beside me with whom to share my journey. On the other hand, when I come through the other side, I will really own my success and the pride that will accompany it for having done it alone. I try to hold onto that thought.
Friday was a big turnaround day, though! First I met with the Amputee Association of NSW and hope to develop a relationship with them that is long lasting and super strong. There is great promise for a mutually rewarding and beneficial future delivering improvements to the amputee community at large. Someone just needs to bring them all together... It was at this meeting that I was shown a picture in a magazine of an athlete using a sea leg with an elbow joint as an arm to ride a bike! Such a resourceful and understanding bunch of people at this association... And it was armed with these new resources and information that I then went and met with APC.
Subsequent to this informative meeting, I elected to continue my journey with APC. Firstly, we are going to get everything sorted to enable me to ride a bike, weight train and run balanced. Stage 2 will look at using the power knee joint to make an adapted elbow for load bearing activity.. But that one is a mission of a couple of hundred thousand dollars and not in my immediate future. The meeting was very positive and filled me with hope and marveling at the possibilities of how my future will unfold. I left smiling. It was exactly what I needed.
What does the immediate future hold for me?'
Til next time! Xx
This week I also met with 2 providers of prosthetic limbs and selected who I am going to proceed with, as they have contacts within the AIS and paralympics.
The first meeting I had on Tuesday left me feeling quite despondent, though of course I never allowed that to show through my determination face. The reality, though, is that upper limb amputations make up only a very small percentage - something like 5% - of all amputees and only a very small percentage of those upper limb amputees are above the elbow. Due to us making up a small minority group, there is no money or market to have stimulated the research, development and production of load bearing, motorised elbow joints. Simply learning this fact left me feeling insignificant and very isolated. Although I learnt that I could acquire tools to assist me in riding a bike, holding a dumbell/barbell and even balance me while I run, my hopes of attempting two-handed push ups and handstands were effectively crushed.
That didn't feel very good. What compounded my sadness and frustrations was that I had no access to speak with anyone like me who would really understand what I was feeling. As a one armed girl in a two armed world, the more I spoke to my friends about it, the more frustrated I became by the fact that they couldn't really get it because they didn't know what disability meant. At the same time, my understanding of what being disabled really means and how it can feel grew tremendously. As my limb deficiency is part of who I am and part of my experience, it would serve me well to become more comfortable with handling these emotions instead of rejecting them in defiance. I'm an adult now and the time has really come for me to embrace and accept the whole package. It is, however, quite a difficult and daunting journey to be embarking on alone. The road is very interesting, but I have no shoulder to cry on when I hit speed bumps. Whilst I'm enjoying the freedom and flexibility of single life, it is difficult facing these challenges alone and a bit sad not to have anyone beside me with whom to share my journey. On the other hand, when I come through the other side, I will really own my success and the pride that will accompany it for having done it alone. I try to hold onto that thought.
Friday was a big turnaround day, though! First I met with the Amputee Association of NSW and hope to develop a relationship with them that is long lasting and super strong. There is great promise for a mutually rewarding and beneficial future delivering improvements to the amputee community at large. Someone just needs to bring them all together... It was at this meeting that I was shown a picture in a magazine of an athlete using a sea leg with an elbow joint as an arm to ride a bike! Such a resourceful and understanding bunch of people at this association... And it was armed with these new resources and information that I then went and met with APC.
Subsequent to this informative meeting, I elected to continue my journey with APC. Firstly, we are going to get everything sorted to enable me to ride a bike, weight train and run balanced. Stage 2 will look at using the power knee joint to make an adapted elbow for load bearing activity.. But that one is a mission of a couple of hundred thousand dollars and not in my immediate future. The meeting was very positive and filled me with hope and marveling at the possibilities of how my future will unfold. I left smiling. It was exactly what I needed.
What does the immediate future hold for me?'
- I'll need to get a script raised for the prosthesis and see how much funding the government will supply.
- The gap will need to be sorted out through fundraising activities of an EPIC nature! More on that when I have the quotes and dollar figures.
- I need to research Amputee Athletes within the AIS and Paralympics to see how I can get on that path.
- I need to write my story... *gulp* This needs to be done post haste as I appear to have my first speaking gig the first week of September.
And in other marvellous news, I have recovered from my injury and was able to run this weekend! Watch out bay runners and city2surfers!
Til next time! Xx
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Serendipity
Last Wednesday morning at 10:05am, less than 48 hours after my previous post, a gentleman who was starting his workout approached me on the gym floor and asked if I could tell him my story. I replied that I was on my way to a meeting but gave him my card.
Luck had it that the meeting was cancelled and I was able to go back and have a very interesting conversation. He asked me if I was interested in public speaking. I said it was my dream. He asked how I lost my arm. I told him my story. He is the CEO of a financial services organisation and interested in my motivational capabilities.
Luck had it that the meeting was cancelled and I was able to go back and have a very interesting conversation. He asked me if I was interested in public speaking. I said it was my dream. He asked how I lost my arm. I told him my story. He is the CEO of a financial services organisation and interested in my motivational capabilities.
The outcome of the 40 minutes that we spent together is that he intends to have me trained in public motivational speaking and has events already earmarked for me to present at. I have been tasked to research the prosthesis that would best serve my requirements and to start working towards breaking the record for one-armed push ups.
It dawned on me at the conclusion of our conversation that, one day very soon, I will ride a bike. I could be on my way to being a role model. This brought me to tears, completely overwhelmed and needing to be pinched.
With cautious optimism, I sent out an email to my close friends to say what had just taken place. We are all so excited about what lies ahead.
Since last Wednesday, I have completed 50 push ups. That was Saturday. I still hurt! The record is 105 in 10 minutes. I reckon I'll go for 120 - by Christmas.
My next meeting with this gentleman (who shall for the time being remain nameless) is scheduled for Monday 12/07/2010 at 11:30am. I'm also meeting a prosthetician the following day, to spec out my exact requirements.
Watch this space!
Monday, June 28, 2010
Adversity Addled
Last night, when I started this entry, I was seated on the floor of my new residence in Randwick, icing my ankle. I have been plagued by running injuries these past months and the latest is Tibialis Posterior Tendinopathy. I was hopeful that 2 weeks of massively reduced training load would be adequate to have me fit to run the Gold Coast Half Marathon, but a test run Sunday morning has very loudly confirmed that I'll be walking the race.
Lucky for me, I'll have walking company! I have been on 2 running camps this year with Sweat Sydney and both were SO enriching! I have met such inspirational, amazing runners and made some life long friends. My friend Nathan Hayes is also currently injured and will be walking the half next Sunday. Its a huge shame for him because he is a lightning fast runner, but with his first full Marathon to look forward to in New York later this year, its important right now to recover from current injuries and nurture his body.
I need to really embrace that injury recovery and healing are key, as I have a major event to look forward to later in the year myself: El Flangers and I are off to Everest Base Camp!
For the month of October, he and I will be trekking through the Himalayas and it is absolutely critical that my body is injury free. Adam has offered me this trek as my birthday gift this year. No one has done anything quite so amazing for me in my entire life and I feel so blessed and honored.
With all this in mind, though, today really hurts. I'm grieving. Frustration and depression are rattling me and I'm struggling hard to hold it together.
The most amazing thing happened for me on the Easter running camp in Jindabyne. Our long Sunday run was from Charlotte Pass to the summit of Mount Kosciusko and Mark Chandler was my running buddy. I loved the run and was grateful for his company. It was awesome to share the experience with him. Once I had reached the summit of our nation's highest peak, I was able to release myself from the fear of failure, if only temporarily. I realised who I am, what I love, where my passion is and what I want from life.
I am a distance runner. I am girl with one arm who finds joy and freedom in running. It is my truest love and my greatest passion. I embraced my power to inspire people. I embraced that I wholly enjoy creating connections with people and sharing stories of our experiences as well as sharing the experiences themselves. I long to ignite the spirits of those people I come into contact with and I want to illuminate them with fresh hope, courage and bravery as they share in mine. I want to travel the world from age 30 running marathons and speaking to people, motivating, inspiring and enriching them. I want to be sponsored to do this.
I want to experience balance in my body and the fullness of function that a human can experience. To this end, I would like my sponsors to assist in funding a functional myoelectric limb. I desperately long to ride a bike and this would allow me to broaden my horizons, expanding my view as an athlete to encompass triathlon.
I guess this injury I am currently suffering does help the triathlete's cause: I will need to get in the pool and on the bike, because it will be some time before I can run again.
It is the accumulation of these desires and experiences that leads me to my grief today. I am separated from the outlet that allows me to connect with my joy, my freedom and my passion. The love and support of my friends right now is vital.
My friend Clint, who is also a PT from Fitness First Bond St just messaged me with some sage advice;
"You can't allow injury to break you mentally. It's a set back, yes, but not the end of the world. You just need to change which half you're going to do. There are heaps more. Nothing will break you if you roll with it. Our job is to keep people motivated and mine is especially to show you that there are opportunities out there every day. Reevaluate yours and move forward - it makes you stronger."
Lucky for me, I'll have walking company! I have been on 2 running camps this year with Sweat Sydney and both were SO enriching! I have met such inspirational, amazing runners and made some life long friends. My friend Nathan Hayes is also currently injured and will be walking the half next Sunday. Its a huge shame for him because he is a lightning fast runner, but with his first full Marathon to look forward to in New York later this year, its important right now to recover from current injuries and nurture his body.
I need to really embrace that injury recovery and healing are key, as I have a major event to look forward to later in the year myself: El Flangers and I are off to Everest Base Camp!
For the month of October, he and I will be trekking through the Himalayas and it is absolutely critical that my body is injury free. Adam has offered me this trek as my birthday gift this year. No one has done anything quite so amazing for me in my entire life and I feel so blessed and honored.
With all this in mind, though, today really hurts. I'm grieving. Frustration and depression are rattling me and I'm struggling hard to hold it together.
The most amazing thing happened for me on the Easter running camp in Jindabyne. Our long Sunday run was from Charlotte Pass to the summit of Mount Kosciusko and Mark Chandler was my running buddy. I loved the run and was grateful for his company. It was awesome to share the experience with him. Once I had reached the summit of our nation's highest peak, I was able to release myself from the fear of failure, if only temporarily. I realised who I am, what I love, where my passion is and what I want from life.
I am a distance runner. I am girl with one arm who finds joy and freedom in running. It is my truest love and my greatest passion. I embraced my power to inspire people. I embraced that I wholly enjoy creating connections with people and sharing stories of our experiences as well as sharing the experiences themselves. I long to ignite the spirits of those people I come into contact with and I want to illuminate them with fresh hope, courage and bravery as they share in mine. I want to travel the world from age 30 running marathons and speaking to people, motivating, inspiring and enriching them. I want to be sponsored to do this.
I want to experience balance in my body and the fullness of function that a human can experience. To this end, I would like my sponsors to assist in funding a functional myoelectric limb. I desperately long to ride a bike and this would allow me to broaden my horizons, expanding my view as an athlete to encompass triathlon.
I guess this injury I am currently suffering does help the triathlete's cause: I will need to get in the pool and on the bike, because it will be some time before I can run again.
It is the accumulation of these desires and experiences that leads me to my grief today. I am separated from the outlet that allows me to connect with my joy, my freedom and my passion. The love and support of my friends right now is vital.
My friend Clint, who is also a PT from Fitness First Bond St just messaged me with some sage advice;
"You can't allow injury to break you mentally. It's a set back, yes, but not the end of the world. You just need to change which half you're going to do. There are heaps more. Nothing will break you if you roll with it. Our job is to keep people motivated and mine is especially to show you that there are opportunities out there every day. Reevaluate yours and move forward - it makes you stronger."
Sunday, March 28, 2010
From Strength to Strength
A few weeks ago whilst out on the bay run with dotmef, I had a very bad fall. I was marvelling at what a beautiful morning it was in Sydney and how blessed we are when I should really have been paying attention to the roots and rocks beneath my feet. As a result, I tripped and fell. I took a very pointy rock in my already problematic left knee. That was the worst of my numerous injuries.
I hobbled around in pain for a few days, humiliated by my inability to walk quickly or negotiate stairs, but with time, I healed. I rested. I listened to my body. I saw doctors and learnt that it was not broken. They said the swelling was not normal, though, and that I need to see a specialist to have that looked at. Its not urgent for me, though. I saw my physio who cleared me of any ligament damage and said the residual pain was the result of bone bruising that could take a few months to settle. I was given the go ahead to start upping my kilometres once more.
So 48 hours later I was on the grass at centennial park, and I ran again the following Thursday and I ran AGAIN Saturday morning and my knee has never felt better! I'm very excited because this time next week I'll be in Jindabyne, having already completed 2 or 3 training runs and preparing to run up Australia's highest peak - Mount Kosciusko!
Conny is back here from Switzerland, so a group of us are going along with Sean William's Sweatsydney training camp to do some running as well as some catching up and chilling out. I cannot wait!
Check out our itinerary!
After an idyllic Sunday spent tandem biking around La Perouse and Little Bay, followed by my nephew's 2nd birthday party, I've just spent 2.5 hours in the kitchen preparing my food for the following week. On the menu are the following items:
I hobbled around in pain for a few days, humiliated by my inability to walk quickly or negotiate stairs, but with time, I healed. I rested. I listened to my body. I saw doctors and learnt that it was not broken. They said the swelling was not normal, though, and that I need to see a specialist to have that looked at. Its not urgent for me, though. I saw my physio who cleared me of any ligament damage and said the residual pain was the result of bone bruising that could take a few months to settle. I was given the go ahead to start upping my kilometres once more.
So 48 hours later I was on the grass at centennial park, and I ran again the following Thursday and I ran AGAIN Saturday morning and my knee has never felt better! I'm very excited because this time next week I'll be in Jindabyne, having already completed 2 or 3 training runs and preparing to run up Australia's highest peak - Mount Kosciusko!
Conny is back here from Switzerland, so a group of us are going along with Sean William's Sweatsydney training camp to do some running as well as some catching up and chilling out. I cannot wait!
Check out our itinerary!
After an idyllic Sunday spent tandem biking around La Perouse and Little Bay, followed by my nephew's 2nd birthday party, I've just spent 2.5 hours in the kitchen preparing my food for the following week. On the menu are the following items:
- Hummus (my recipe)
- Salsa (my recipe)
- TONNES of crudites - snowpeas, capsicum, carrot, celery, cucumber
- A massive salad dressed in seeded mustard and lemon juice with lots of olives and cherry tomatoes
- 3 grilled fish fillets
- A huge batch of DELICIOUS spinach and chick pea soup
- 4 boiled eggs.
Om nom nom and bon appetit! :) Time to check in on my challengers! Xx
Monday, February 1, 2010
Good Food and Gratitude!
I can't believe I'm already on day 29 of the 12 week challenge! Holy cow, it just flies. The first month of 2010 is already over and that just completely blows my mind.
I've lost 1.5kgs, which is pretty sweet considering I'm already a very active person and a healthy eater with little to lose. I though that seeing as the challenge is 1/3 of the way over, I'd share some of my favourite foods with you.
Today I made Tanya Dyhin's breakfast smoothie. Her base ingredients are fruit, soy milk, an egg, cinnamon and ice. Mine had an egg, malt free organic soy milk, half a frozen banana, some frozen mango chunks and raspberries with cinnamon. Pretty tasty indeed!
I make another type of smoothie as an afternoon snack. It has soft or silken tofu, cinnamon, frozen berries (no bananas for me after midday cos of the carb content) and ice. If you add water or juice its a smoothie, but I like to eat it like yoghurt, with a spoon.
I eat loads of tinned and frozen fish - I know fresh is best, but its just not that convenient for my lifestyle, eating out of my backpack. I eat the tiny tins of smoked salmon in springwater as well the coles brand spanish, italian, morrocan, mexican, japanese and spicy tomato and chilli tunas. I split a tin of sardines in spring water into 2 serves.
I make my own hummus using chickpeas, lemon juice, garlic, tahini and I add chilli and cumin. I dip celery, carrot, capsicum and cucumber in it, as well as the occasion wholegrain 9 grains vita wheats or a couple of multigrain or soy and linseed corn thins. I might also spread a little macro organic nothing added crunchy peanut butter on one of those as a treat. Whilst on the subject of chick peas, I buy the bag of chick nuts from woolworths and divide it up into little snack container portions which are great on the go.
I have first lunch, around lunch time, and second lunch, later on. For first lunch I might have a version of a lentil stew i make at home. Sometimes I use regular lentils, sometime yellow, sometimes both! I cook them slowly with onions, garlic, spinach and tomatoes (tinned, fresh or both) and any number of herbs or spices - chilli, ginger, tumeric and cumin are all wonderful. I throw in mushrooms and olives if I have some. Sometimes I'll mix that with a tin of salmon post reheating.
Second lunch is usually a salad with a tin of fish and a piece of fruit (nectarine, blueberries, peach). My salads contain loads of green leaves and cherry tomatoes, cucumber, olives and mushies. I dress it with seeded mustard, lemon juice and a splash of olive oil. Sometimes its steamed firm tofu with chilli, broccoli and various other vegies.
I try not to eat dinner after 8, but that's not always easy working my hours! My favourite meal is grilled salmon and steamed vegies - carrots, brussel sprouts, broccoli, beans, peas, zucchini, capsicum - I'll eat them all if I've got them! I will always use vegies as the base of my meal and also like to make a stir fry using a frozen hoki fillet. Both are very quick, very easy, tasty, satisfying and ultra healthy.
Hopefully this gives you all some healthy ideas that you can introduce into your days!
Onto the next subject, I'm going through some pretty tough times in life right now, but I think its important to express gratitude for what we do have, especially when worried, sad or suffering. So today, I choose to express gratitude in the form of a top ten list. Here goes:
- I'm thankful for the car my mum bought me. Stellar is the basis of my independence and is a wonderful machine that brings me immense pleasure and joy.
- I'm thankful for my mum and all my brothers and sisters who are there to hear me and support.
- I'm thankful for my wonderful friends and clients who make a huge and positive impact on my life in so many ways.
- I'm thankful for my chosen career path and my business, which provides me with the amazing opportunity to help people find better health, better confidence, greater happiness and longer life. I truly believe that society at large has an immense need to recconnect with body and breath, that being trapped inside our minds and stuck behind desks is a tremendous problem, but one I aim to combat.
- I'm thankful for being in this body that allows me to dance and run. YAY I LOVE TO DANCE! YAY I LOVE TO RUN! Also, the specifics of my body and how I was born give me greater connection with it, as well as enabling me to inspire people! That's a huge gift :)
- I'm thankful to live in Sydney! It's such a beautiful city with so many benefits. The sea, the weather, a beautiful harbour, every modern convenience, access to fresh food, water and air... This list could be a long one!
- While we're at it, I'm just thankful to live! To experience the fullness of the human condition, for all its ups and downs.
- I'm thankful for the internet! It allows me to connect with you all in so many ways and is a fantastic research tool! I only wish I had more time to take advantage of it.
- I'm thankful that, for the most part, I do not want for necessities. I have shelter, food, clothing and transport. Already I have so much more than so many millions of people I share this planet with.
- Finally, I'm thankful for Hayden. I know what it is to be truly loved, nurtured, supported, looked after and cared for and it is such a tremendous blessing that I'm truly grateful now for every single day that it was mine.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
It has begun!!
I guess some of you might be wanting to know more about the challenge than just my facebook status updates give away. Besides, that's my version of the challenge!
So here's how it works:
It doesn’t have to be about doing something drastic. It needs to be a commitment to making a difference.
You might want to pull out all the stops and do everything possible to be your ABSOLUTE best in 12 weeks. Or you might prefer to look long term and use my 12 week challenge as the first step in sculpting your lifestyle to be healthy forever, by implementing small changes, week by week.
We can work it how you want it. I’ll design this with you. It’s an individual program which is specific to your needs. The essentials remain the same:
· We track your diet and teach you how to eat properly to optimize your body function.
· We schedule your exercise routines and get you active, moving, breathing and burning.
· I keep you focussed and on track.
· I monitor your progress and record your results.
And those results are universal. You WILL have a better body in 84 days.
What you need to do:
1. Nominate a start date.
2. Maintain a food and exercise journal until such time as we are both satisfied that you know how to eat and properly to achieve your goals. Nominate your preference - paper or online.
3. Commit to a weekly weigh-in around the same time one morning each week and submit the results.
4. Submit a weekly exercise schedule to me – in advance.
5. Accept my weekly challenges and homework tasks.
My Commitment to YOU:
· If you’ve selected an online food and exercise journal, I’ll create that account for you and get you set up.
· I’ll track your progress, keep score and reward your efforts!
· I’ll keep it interesting! No 2 workouts with me will ever be the same, and no 2 weeks of your challenge will ever be the same.
· I’ll send you new information and resources every week to educate and motivate you.
· I will be there for you. If you need your hand held, I’ll do it. If you need an ear, I’ll listen. If you need advice I’ll give it!
· I WILL support and encourage you and I WILL NOT let you down.
If there’s anything else you need, please tell me! I’ll do my best to accommodate you. I want you to succeed and I’m here to help!
How awesome is that?? I love it!!
Check out my spiffy promo flier from the inimitable Ingrid of Frankenmedia Design!
How awesome is that?? I love it!!Sunday, January 3, 2010
On The Eve of my 12 Week Challenge!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Welcome to 2010 :)
I trust we've all had a fantastic break. I know *mine* was indulgent and spectacular, but as of tomorrow, all that is going to change.
Tomorrow, I'm starting my own 12 week challenge. 84 days from tomorrow, on Monday, March 29th, I want to look in the mirror, stand on the scale and be 100% certain that I look and feel the best I have ever looked. I want to be the fittest, leanest and meanest me that anyone has ever seen. And I want to stay that way for the rest of my life.
I'm planning my workouts for the next week, and I'm starting off with 6 days of strict detox. No refined flours, no sugars except those in fruit, no red meat, no dairy, no numbers or anything artificial. I'll be eating loads of fresh fruit and veg, silken tofu, organic malt free soy milk, chick peas, lentils and beans.
I'd go for longer, but on January 10th I have a 'girls picnic' planned at the winery. No problem! I have a strategy for coping with that. Food events just signal that I have to do an hour of hard workout on both the day, as well as the day after the event. That's all planned. Everything is negotiable and forewarned is fore-armed!
I have loads of other strategies to help get me through the challenge, a weekly weigh in to keep me accountable and a support network to hold me to it, too.
I also have a whole stack of online resources I'll be taking advantage of to keep me motivated and informed on how to eat clean and be healthy.
I will gladly share these with strategies and online resources with you, as well as inform you of my progress - just respond and say you're interested - but better yet:
JOIN THE CHALLENGE!
Experience the Debzillah Difference and Be Inspired to find your fittest, most fabulous self in 2010!
Kick off the new year like never before. Witness the incredible transformation your body can undergo with this program combining diet, exercise and expert motivation.
Makeover and photoshoot opportunities as well as skin care and beauty services, not to mention inspirational books, await the winners!
BE FIT. BE FABULOUS. BE INSPIRED!
I will guide you, provide interesting challenges for bonus points from week to week, and help you develop strategies SPECIFICALLY to suit you and get the most out of the 12 weeks. I will be with you and keep you on track EVERY STEP OF THE WAY.
So who is with me? WE CAN DO THIS!
C'mon. Get in touch. Tell your friends. Let's get started :)
Welcome to 2010 :)
I trust we've all had a fantastic break. I know *mine* was indulgent and spectacular, but as of tomorrow, all that is going to change.
Tomorrow, I'm starting my own 12 week challenge. 84 days from tomorrow, on Monday, March 29th, I want to look in the mirror, stand on the scale and be 100% certain that I look and feel the best I have ever looked. I want to be the fittest, leanest and meanest me that anyone has ever seen. And I want to stay that way for the rest of my life.
I'm planning my workouts for the next week, and I'm starting off with 6 days of strict detox. No refined flours, no sugars except those in fruit, no red meat, no dairy, no numbers or anything artificial. I'll be eating loads of fresh fruit and veg, silken tofu, organic malt free soy milk, chick peas, lentils and beans.
I'd go for longer, but on January 10th I have a 'girls picnic' planned at the winery. No problem! I have a strategy for coping with that. Food events just signal that I have to do an hour of hard workout on both the day, as well as the day after the event. That's all planned. Everything is negotiable and forewarned is fore-armed!
I have loads of other strategies to help get me through the challenge, a weekly weigh in to keep me accountable and a support network to hold me to it, too.
I also have a whole stack of online resources I'll be taking advantage of to keep me motivated and informed on how to eat clean and be healthy.
I will gladly share these with strategies and online resources with you, as well as inform you of my progress - just respond and say you're interested - but better yet:
JOIN THE CHALLENGE!
Experience the Debzillah Difference and Be Inspired to find your fittest, most fabulous self in 2010!
Kick off the new year like never before. Witness the incredible transformation your body can undergo with this program combining diet, exercise and expert motivation.
Makeover and photoshoot opportunities as well as skin care and beauty services, not to mention inspirational books, await the winners!
BE FIT. BE FABULOUS. BE INSPIRED!
I will guide you, provide interesting challenges for bonus points from week to week, and help you develop strategies SPECIFICALLY to suit you and get the most out of the 12 weeks. I will be with you and keep you on track EVERY STEP OF THE WAY.
So who is with me? WE CAN DO THIS!
C'mon. Get in touch. Tell your friends. Let's get started :)
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
The Foibles of Frustration
Having one arm, whilst not a living nightmare or anything of the sort, comes with a whole lot of frustration.
Washing cutlery, carrying multiple items of any description, plaiting hair, tying corsets, cutting vegetables, bike riding, opening jars - the list of daily tasks that bear the burden of causing frustration because I find them so inherently difficult is quite long.
I'm quite independent, and I do as much as I can for myself as often as I can, but I do tire of it and most certainly appreciate when others offer assistance. I, personally, am always reluctant to request assist because I don't want to bother others with any of the annoyance or frustration that is part of my experience.
I usually do an OK job of not letting it get to me, of just getting on with it, of accomplishing bigger and better things to ensure that the small annoyances are kept in perspective....
There are a few things I do struggle with, however, and I happen to feel like like sharing them.
I never wanted an artificial arm growing up.
I was never made aware, at any time, that there might be a cut off date for my decision. That I might not be able to get a useful artificial limb once I turned a certain age. I only discovered that when I looked into my options 18 months ago, seeking any possible improvements to my quality of life and any possible reduction to my frustration level. What I learned was that the government would not provide funding for me to be equipped with any sort of bionic limb as I was over 15 years old and apparently unlikely to get any beneficial use from it.
No health professional assessed my unilateral condition and prescribed exercises to balance my physique, nor did they suggest that lever length and weight bearing activity on my left hand side would be necessary to stimulate muscular development or bone growth. These are conclusions I've come to myself, now that I'm an adult and qualified health professional.
I need that blasted artificial limb and the plastic, immovable barbie arm will not cut it. I need something to balance me out, something of comparable weight to a real arm. Something that can GRASP, so that I can lift weights, or hold stuff to open lids or chop vegetables or carry things.
Constantly lifting with my right hand side, conducting frequent weight bearing activity, always through one single side of my body - its not good! I'm prone to frequent injuries caused by strain and overuse, my pelvis is unstable which impacts my knees when I run, my abs develop asymmetrically because of core compensation - if I were to list all the physical consequences we would be here until xmas 2010!
The point of the story is, it took me a good while to swallow my pride and admit that I needed something more than what nature has granted me. In addition to my daily frustrations, it is further frustrating that if I am to procure a functional bionic limb, it would be to the value of a very large deposit on a very nice house in a lovely Sydney suburb from my own pocket, because no one bothered to tell me anything about anything as I was growing up this way.
I could throttle the general practice where I grew up. My parents were never offered any form of advice, consultation or referral on appropriate management of the development of limb deficient children. It came as a complete shock to everyone when the bone in my short left arm grew through the skin, creating infection, causing me tremendous pain and requiring surgery. In reality, it could easily have been predicted if I had effective management. I have no phalanges on the left hand side. Without creases in my elbow or knuckles on that side of my body, there was no way the skin could stretch to keep up with my bony growth spurt.
I don't want to moan, though. What I do want is to run. To ride. To climb. To lift. To lengthen my left trapezius and strengthen my latissimus dorsi. I need a functional lever in order to achieve these things and now I'm faced with the frustrations of not knowing where to turn and not being able to throw money at a solution.
I hope to find a solution to this pickle by the conclusion of 2010!
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Yule and Yippee!
Boxing day is upon us and we're wrapping up from xmas 2009 - my best xmas yet!
Not because of gifts (though they were excellent and plentiful!), but because of the amount of joy happiness contained within one day.
I woke at 620am and quickly dressed. 30 short minutes later I embarked on an 8km run to my sister's house in Concord for xmas breakfast. It wasn't a great run, my body complained loudly, but I ran at my own lazy pace and enjoyed listening to a podcast, which I hadn't done in some time. It was the gift I wanted to give myself - the gift of a run listening to my body. I arrived at the same time as mum and Hayden, which was excellent and got all the presents inside. My sister laid on a delicious breakfast feast with all sorts of delicious xmas naughtiness, everything from traditional xmas slice and fruitcake to smoked chicken and cranberry sauce and mango lychee salad with gippsland yoghurt. I played with Angus, my nephew, for a long time, running around in the garden, hopping jumping squealing and skipping. Then at 10:30 it was time to come home.
I had a run sheet listing in detail all the things that needed to be prepared for our xmas party and Mum and Hayden were just exceptional at assisting in executing every preparatory step. Hayden had spent days in advance preparing the house and setting up, we had glazed the ham and made the stuffing and custard the night before, so on xmas day we just focused on preparing each dish in order at set times. It was all amazingly stress free.
Frank brought 4 dozen oysters and a kilo of the nicest prawns I've ever eaten, Claudia and Chandler brought white wines and a selection of hard cheeses, Lauren brought red wines and a selection of soft cheeses and Vanessa brought a smoked salmon and cream pastry for entree. Hayden and mum had prepared boccinci basil and kumato skewers, as well.
My menu of mains included all manner of roast vegetables in fresh rosemary and sea salt, steamed broccolini with toasted almonds, parmesan pear and rocket salad, blacked and ginger glazed ham and, of course, the turkey, which contained a mango and macadamia stuffing.
We were all completely stuffed but everything was so delicious! I served my famous and popular mango trifle for dessert. This was accompanied by duelling dessert wines - my lillypilly and Chandler's De Bortoli. No one had room for coffee, brandy snaps or even a shot of limoncello. My stomach screamed in agony and I knew I had pushed too far! So painful, moaning from being overstuffed - I had to change my dress!! I'm not proud to admit I crossed the line and ate far too much for my little tum to handle and committed in massive overindulgence. It felt really bad and I don't ever want to do it again!
The cleanup was even easier. Everyone pitched in and 98% of the washing up was done and put away before our final guests left at 1130pm!
Today, however, I feel a bit like I've been hit by a truck. All I'm capable of is sitting here in my dressing gown. I have loads of admin and research to do though, and its not often that I get the opportunity to spend a day either on my bottom nor at home. Building up my business is consuming about 65 hours of my week, all of which are spent without net access. Next week, however, is looking particularly quiet, so I'm hoping to finalise details and prizes for the Debzillah 12 week challenge! But more on that later :)
Here, have a few photos.
Time to watch a movie and finish reading Born to Run :)
Merry Christmas Tigers! Xx
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Bliss in Byron Bay
On Saturday October 24th, late in the morning after I had finished both my sessions at Personal Best Leichhardt and Shazzas Boot Camps, Hayden and I set off for a few days in Byron Bay.
I had planned on going to Byron for my first time in order to run the 10km lighthouse race, however my injuries from the half marathon had still not yet adequately recovered to allow me to cover the distance. So Hayden registered as well and we agreed to walk the course together.
We caught the regional bus from Ballina Airport and checked into our accommodation (Ruskin House) which was just lovely, and then set out to find Mongers for fish and chips. We ate them on main beach, which was super super gusty! We nearly got blown away :) We then rented 3 Colours Blue and later ventured out for late night ice cream and were again nearly blown away - but this time by the sheer quantities of raucous trash and bogans that descend on Byron Bay of a Saturday evening!
We were up before 6am on Sunday morning, in order to head in early and register for the Lighthouse Walk. After we collected our bibs and timing chips, we milled about the start line with about 500 people, then at 7am it was off - and for many - running! We had completed the strenuous, hilly and very picturesque walk by 830am. We collected out commemorative drink bottles, ate some watermelon and headed to The Balcony for breakfast. I had hot chocolate and brioche with lemon macadamia butter. Hayden had coffee and the big brekky. It was fab! Later, Hayden's sister (Mel), her partner (Dan) and their children dogs, collected us and took us to ocean shores beach. It was the middle of the day, though, and scorching hot, so we didn't last long. Then it was off for lunch at Yami's in Brunswick Heads. Delicious felafels, hummus and baba ganoush were plentiful and we left absolutely stuffed.
Later, we went bushwalking around tallows head beach and had beautiful sunset cocktails at The Balcony. We picked up some gelato for the road and caught some live music at The Buddha Bar. Later we ate noodles from Noodle Box... Some things I shouldn't bother mentioning :P
Monday was chillout day... Kind of... After another early start for scuba diving, we got massages at Osho's House and saw UP! at the cinema. Later we went to Dish for their degustation dinner. They even did a special menu for me, as I'm pescetarian, with specially matched wines. It was AMAZING.
On Tuesday morning, I left Hayden sleeping in bed and donned my backpack. There were bushtrails I longed to walk (I hadn't seen the most easterly point of Australia yet!) and a swim in the ocean was in order, to cleanse me of the sins of the night before. I saw a man set out on his jog and sighed to myself wistfully "that sure looks like fun..." and I gave it a shot. I ran. It felt incredible. I cried with joy. I gleefully greeted everyone I passed with a chirpy "good morning!" and beaming smile. I didn't run the whole time, but whenever I felt I could, I did, and as I ran I listened to The Runners Round Table on my phone, which featured the amazing Kristen Armstrong... It was the best morning of my life. I felt connected, whole, stable, safe and FREE.
At the end of my run I cooled off in the water at Main Beach and trudged home in my towel and thongs. Breakfast at Bohemia concluded our visit to Byron... you can see what we ordered on facebook!
I can't WAIT to go back next year... I loved Byron. It was easily and by far the very best holiday I have ever had. In three days.
Check out the photos.
Xx Debzillah
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Taking Stock
Just because I still can't run doesnt mean that life isn't wonderful! It definitely is. Just have a look at the weather we've been blessed with the last 2 days.
I, in particular, have been blessed as I've been able to enjoy that weather fully. Yesterday I walked with Conny from The Spit to Manly and today I walked myself into Haberfield to check out Primavera - part of Crave Sydney.
Yesterday's walk was long, hard, magnificent, spectacular and limitlessly rewarding - 11km in under 3 hours. It was also the last time I will see Conny until her return from Switzerland in January 2010. But today was pretty special in its own right.
I became familiar with my 'hood. I walked streets, tracks and paths that I didn't know and hadn't explored. I felt like an adventurer and it was awesome. I had set off after my team meeting at Personal Best and I discovered a new universe in my very own backyard. I enjoyed every moment of it, all on my own.
Had I only remembered to wear sunscreen whilst out walking in the middle of the day, I wouldn't have come home, fallen asleep and woken up reincarnated as a lobster. Oops.
In news of things foodie, Hayden and I have started a weekly trip to The Big Brekky. Its close to home, listed amongst the top ten cafes in Sydney, and for good reason. We're lovin' it. Hehehe.
And looking further back, Wednesday evening we attended the Merivale Ash St Long Table Dinner - a 120 person communal dining experience as part of Good Food Month. It was INCREDIBLE. The best value meal we've ever had - $50 a head and the food was exceptional, bountiful and the wine flowed as if it were water.
Looking forward, tomorrow we'll be walking to check out Summer Hill Global Village and preparing for the week to come. I'm also hoping to go swimming with Trogdor.
Next Saturday we'll be off to Byron Bay and - GOOD NEWS! - my lovely physio says I'll be in shape to run the 10km!! I'll be slow, I'm sure, but I'll BE RUNNING!!! I'm so excited I could EXPLODE. Seriously. Put your rain coat on - there's real danger here.
Now that I'm onto the topic of running - which we all know I HATE discussing ehehehehe - listening to The Runner's Round Table podcast about barefoot running on Thursday afternoon whilst I walked from Wynyard to Leichhardt has me DESPERATELY hanging to get into the Vibram Five Fingers store in Waverly. As far as my xmas list goes, they are no. 1! I must find out my size. The podcast did inspire me to splurge and indulge myself in a copy of Born to Run, which should arrive in my hot little hands next week.
Now, as I'm so bummed about not having been able to participate in the World Wide Festival of Races last weekend, I am determined to actively participate in this years Sydney Summer Twilight Series and encourage you to join me! I'm thinking that Sunday Brunch runs will take place on the alternating weekends throughout summer and start at 8am to avoid heat stroke, with distances between 8 and 15km.
Llinos and I will be racing in the first annual Run4Fun at Homebush on November 8th - please have a look at participating, the best thing about running is the community. Be part of something bigger! There's no donation plate here...
Before I wrap it up, I have to give myself a bit of a plug. My domain has been registered and is currently under construction and a business is being built. The hard yards truly have begun.
<3
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